70 Funny Christmas Jokes For Kids (Free Printable Joke Cards)

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What better way to get in the Christmas spirit than with a few funny Christmas jokes and riddles for kids? We have compiled 70 of our favourite Christmas-themed jokes and riddles that are sure to make you laugh this holiday season.

From child-friendly festive jokes to Christmas knock knock jokes and funny Christmas riddles that will have you thinking, this collection of holiday jokes are sure to bring on a few belly laughs in December!

Plus I have free printable Christmas Joke Cards for you in my printable library!

8 Ways To Use These Christmas Jokes

A list of jokes is more useful when you’ve got somewhere to put them. Here’s how we use ours through December.

In the lunch box. One joke card a day for the last few weeks of term. My printable Christmas lunch box jokes are made for exactly this.
Inside home made crackers. Far better than the ones that come in shop-bought crackers. Here’s how to make your own Christmas crackers.
From your elf. Have your Elf on the Shelf leave a new joke every morning. It’s one of the easiest scenes to set up and takes about thirty seconds.
In the advent calendar. One joke behind each door, on its own or alongside a treat. More advent calendar filler ideas here.
At the Christmas table. Give every guest a joke on arrival to tell during the meal.
On the drive to see the lights. Read them out from the front seat while you’re stuck in traffic.
As a party game. Read the set up, first person to shout the punchline wins. Works alongside Christmas charades and the left right game.
On the fridge whiteboard. Write the setup in the morning and leave the answer for after school.

Christmas Jokes For Kids

Let’s get the kids giggling with these festive Christmas jokes that are guaranteed to amuse. These Christmas jokes are PG-rated which makes them the perfect option for adding to your homemade Christmas crackers or as part of your advent calendar daily surprises too.

We have used some of these jokes inside our homemade Christmas crackers.

Here are the funniest Christmas jokes we could find to entertain you this festive season:

What do Santa’s helpers learn at school? The elf-abet!

Why was the snowman sorting carrots? He was picking his nose!

What do snowmen have for breakfast? Snowflakes!

Why was Santa’s little helper so sad? Because he has a low “elf” esteem!

What reindeer game do reindeer play at sleepovers? Truth or deer.

What do monkeys sing at Christmas? Jungle bells!

How do the elves clean Santa’s sleigh on the day after Christmas? They use Santa-tiser.

What goes “Oh, Oh, Oh”? Santa walking backwards!

Why are Christmas trees so bad at knitting? They have too many needles.

What did one Christmas tree say to another? Lighten up!

Why did no one bid for Rudolph and Prancer on eBay? Because they were two deer!

Why don’t you ever see Santa in the hospital? Because he has private elf care!

What do you call Santa when he’s broke? Saint Nickel-less

How do snowmen get around? They ride an icicle!

What is Jack Frost’s favourite part of school? Snow and tell.

What is a parent’s favourite Christmas Carol? Silent Night.

What are a Christmas tree’s favourite treats? Ornamints.

What does the gingerbread man make his bed with? Cookie sheets

Where does Santa Claus keep all his money? At the local snow bank.

What do you call a reindeer with bad manners? RUDE-olph!

How does a frog open his Christmas presents? Rippit! Rippit!

How do you tell if a Christmas Tree is a girl? Because it will be wearing a tree skirt.

Why didn’t the turkey eat anything? Because he was stuffed!

What is the elves’ favourite type of music? Wrap music!

How can you tell that Santa is good at karate? Because he has a black belt

Who delivers Christmas presents to dogs? Santa Paws

Who delivers Christmas presents to cats? Santa Claws

Who delivers Christmas presents to baby sharks? Santa Jaws

How do sheep say Merry Christmas? Fleece Navidad!

What is the best Christmas gift you can give someone? A broken drum because it cannot be beaten!

What do snowmen eat for lunch? Ice-bergers!

What does Santa do when his elves misbehave? He gives them the sack!

What is an elf’s favourite kind of sport? North-pole vaulting.

What kind of motorcycle does Santa like to ride? A Holly Davidson!

How does Santa give Mrs. Claus the weather report? It looks like rain, dear!

What do you get if you cross Santa with a duck? A Christmas Quacker!

What kind of Christmas party does the snowman like to have? A snow ball.

What kind of bug hates Christmas? A bah hum bug

What do you call Santa’s little helpers? Subordinate clauses.

Who is Santa’s favourite singer? Elf-is Presley

What do you get if you cross Father Christmas with a detective? Santa Clues!

What do reindeer hang on their Christmas trees? Horn-aments!

What do you get if you cross a Christmas tree with an apple? A pineapple!

What do you get if you cross a bell with a skunk? Jingle Smells!

What goes Ho Ho Whoosh, Ho Ho Whoosh? Santa sweeping the floor.

What is Tarzan’s favourite Christmas song? Jungle Bells!

What kind of cars do elves like to drive? An Elfa-romeo!

What does Santa spend his hard-earned salary on? Jingle bills

What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman.

What’s the difference between the Christmas alphabet and the ordinary alphabet? The Christmas alphabet has No-el.

What happened to the man who stole the Advent Calendar? He got 25 days.

What did the doctor prescribe the stressed-out snowman? A chill pill

What is a cow’s favourite holiday? Moo-Years Day

What do you call an elf wearing ear muffs? Whatever you want. He can’t hear you anyway.

Christmas Knock Knock Jokes

These Christmas knock knock jokes are sure to be a parent’s favourite over the Christmas season with silly and hilarious Christmas jokes that kids will adore.

Here are our favourite knock-knock jokes for Christmas:

Knock, knock!

Who’s there?

Avery.

Avery who?

Avery Merry Christmas to you!

Knock, knock!

Who’s there?

Yah.

Yah who?

Wow, you’re really excited about Christmas!

Knock Knock.

Who’s there?

Mary.

Mary who?

Mary Christmas!

Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

Ho Ho.

Ho Ho who?

Your Santa impression needs some work.

Knock Knock

Who’s there?

Wanda.

Wanda who?

Wanda know what you’re getting for Christmas?

Knock Knock

Who’s there?

Noah.

Noah who?

Noah good Christmas joke?

Free Printable Christmas Joke Cards

Christmas joke cards for kids printable.

I’ve turned the best of these into a printable set you can cut into cards. Print them on plain paper for lunch boxes, or on cardstock if you want them to survive a school bag.

GET THE FREE JOKE CARDS

Want some even cuter options? My printable Christmas lunch box jokes has a card for every school day in December, plus the whole Christmas Party Game Bundle if you want the games too.

The Best Christmas Riddles For Kids

A riddle is not just a type of wordplay. It’s also the perfect way to add some humour into your Christmas celebration and get everyone thinking hard too. These Christmas riddles for kids are perfect for practising their problem-solving skills.

Here are our favourite Christmas riddles that will make you giggle this holiday season:

I come in a lot of colours, so lovely and bright. I turn so many houses into a beautiful sight. What am I? Christmas lights.

I am something you can catch easily but cannot throw, especially during winter. What am I? A cold

What has a lot of needles but cannot sew? A Christmas tree!

You can hold me and shake me, but I’m easy to break. I have lots of snow, even though all of it’s fake! What am I? A snowglobe

It has two colours and is minty yet sweet, you’ll soon be “hooked”—isn’t that neat! What is it? A candy cane

I am found in Harry Potter as well as Lord of the Rings. I also make gifts and spread a smile. Who am I? Elves.

I am a ball that does not bounce and cold to touch. What am I? A snowball

When going around the world this animal can find its way. It goes to every country while lighting up Santa’s way. Who am I? Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer

I can travel all around the world just like Santa Claus without ever leaving my corner. What am I? A stamp.

What’s red and white and goes up and down and up and down? Santa Claus delivering gifts down the chimneys.

I’m a cookie you might like to eat. Some might say I am a favourite Christmas treat. I have brown arms, eyes, and don’t forget my feet. What am I? Gingerbread man

Dropping from the sky, more beautiful than rain. There are no two pieces that will ever look the same. What am I? Snowflakes

Want more ideas? Grab this Christmas joke book:

Get cracking on these hilarious and cheesy Christmas jokes and riddles to keep your kids laughing all the way until Christmas morning. Whether you are looking for a way to make your kids laugh, or want some funny jokes and riddles to add to your Christmas morning activities, this list of funny Christmas riddles and jokes has something for everyone.

We hope these Christmas jokes and riddles for kids will help you celebrate with laughter all through December until Christmas day arrives!